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Everybody Is Going To Think This Is Stupid

Crowd of millennials on cell phones

This was the EXACT thought I had when starting this blog… I convinced myself that everyone would think my writing was dumb. That is, until I read Finding Your Own North Star by Martha Beck.

If you are a millennial having trouble pinpointing your passion, you MUST read this work of self-help art. Throughout the book, Martha Beck will guide you towards the watering hole in the vast desert that is your life. No, but seriously, she’s a genius. I found myself physically nodding in agreement and realization at the wisdom she offers on each page. But, if I had to pick a favorite tidbit, it would have to be the excerpt about the “Everybody Committee.” Holy crap did this resonate with me… Here’s how it goes:

If you have an inner critic (and you probably do), fill in the following sentences:

Everybody expects me to _______________________________.

If I follow my dream, Everybody will think ____________________.

Now, list 6 real people who have actually said those things to you.

Like me, you’ll have a hard time pointing out specific people that have actually expressed these words to you. We create this generalized “Everybody” in our minds that are always rooting against us.

But, guess what? “Everybody” doesn’t give a f*ck about you. They’re worried about THEIR problems. Not yours.

In a sense, this “Everybody Committee” has become an excuse NOT to take the leap and strive for our goals. We hide behind this generalized group of people with a distorted mindset and think that EVERYONE will bully us on the playground if we fulfill our desires.

When the idea of a self-help blog for millennials popped into my mind, I couldn’t help but have these negative thoughts. I just pictured a group of girls from high school sitting at the computer, snickering at every word I wrote.

Mean girls bullying

But when it came down to it, I couldn’t name ONE person that told me my writing sucked or my ideas were shit. (Yes, I had a hamburger thrown at my face by my boyfriend’s redneck ex-girlfriend, but that doesn’t count.) The point is, there was no reason for these thoughts. They were my own self-deprecating judgments.

So the next time you say “Everybody will think my book is dumb” or “Everybody will laugh at me for taking dance classes at age 45,” slap yourself back into reality. Most people are concerned about their own limiting beliefs so don’t focus so intensely on yours.

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March 24, 2017
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  • Fatima

    Love this!!! You’re absolutely correct in your post. I think we should live by thinking about what’s best for us and not the world. Thank you for sharing!!

    • Caroline

      Thank you! It can be tough NOT to think these negative thoughts but it’s so crucial!

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