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Personal Development

What Happens When You Stop Living For Other People

What Happens When You Stop Living For Others

I was recently faced with an alarming wake-up call: I hadn’t been living for me.

For so long, I was doing what I thought would make others happy instead of living the life I wanted to live. Don’t get me wrong, I love helping others and entertaining my friends and family, but not at the expense of my happiness… As The Chainsmokers (God I love them) put it, I was setting myself on fire to keep everyone else warm.

Once I took control of my life, this is what I discovered:

1. I met amazing people.
When I began picking up hobbies that made ME happy, I came into contact with others that shared similar interests. At church, I made friends with fellow Christians that were looking to explore a deeper connection with God. In my writing classes, I networked with other bloggers that wanted to share their story. At Delia’s obedience class, I hung out with puppy owners that wanted to also pull their hair out. Taking care of myself attracted the right kind of people into my life.

2.  I discovered my talents.
I had always been interested in writing but I never pursued it as a career. I used to be so caught up in building a life that other people wanted me to live that I pushed my talents to the side. Now I’m realizing how much I enjoy blogging and helping others find their passion in life.

3. I became more productive.
Now that I’m actually doing the things I love, I get so much more sh*t done. I wake up earlier, I’m more organized, I network frequently… I find joy in to-do lists that include “write blog post, attend Elite OC event, and change graphics on About Me page” because I know that I am working towards my dream.

4. I built up confidence.
I actually know what the hell I’m talking about now! At my last company, I wasn’t trained properly and didn’t care anything about what I was doing so my confidence level was non-existent. I would drag my feet before calling clients because I would dread the conversation. Now, if you want to talk writing or health and wellness, you might have trouble shutting me up.

5. I discovered my values.
When you live a life shaped by others, you lose track of what is important to you. I used to think that wealth and belonging were everything in life due to the people I surrounded myself with. But once I did a little soul searching, I realized that those are pretty far down on the list for me. If you need help with this subject, check out my recent post on Pinpointing Your Core Values.

Take a good look at your daily life. Are you living for yourself? Or are you just going along with whatever makes others happy? Make a list of things that light you up and make you feel confident, productive, and valuable. Then start pursuing those “joy points” like crazy.

Once you begin to focus on what makes you happy, others will take note and feed off of your badass positive energy.

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